DOTTY (The Naughty Ones Book 3) Page 11

  The swearing is a dead giveaway that her cute butt is going straight to the warm place but I can’t even find it within me to chastise her as the truth knocks me sideways.

  Those greedy assholes!

  “Are you telling me that once I marry that little turd…?”

  “He’ll receive his money as will you and…did you not know this, Miss Harper? I was so sure you were aware after Mr. Summers and your father consulted with me on this matter.”

  “No! I should have known this, though. Why didn’t I know this? Cancer my ass!” I yell, letting the rage take me.

  It’s poor form to tear up a church, but as I take it all in and finally realize that my damn parents are nothing more than greedy pigs, I just can’t seem to care about what happens to me afterward.

  I want to rage and yell and start ripping heads off.

  “Now, Dotty darling, deep breaths. Save the animal rage for those idiots out there,” Indie says slowly, approaching me with caution.

  “This is why he fucked up my happiness? This is why I’ve spent months killing myself when Mother all of a sudden wanted me in their lives? For money!” I screech, so loudly poor Bilbo leaps a foot back and swallows audibly.

  “Well, look, it could be worse?”

  Yeah right, I snort, casting Luci a fulminating glare.

  A few deep breaths later I feel less like a volcano about to erupt and I turn to the attorney with a sweet smile that I know looks evil without me even having to see myself.

  “What happens to that money once I marry a Summers?”

  “Well, it goes right to you. No red tape, no wait. All I need are account numbers for the transfer and that’s it.”

  “That won’t be happening today, though. In about a week, definitely, but not today. I’ll need your card with your personal contact numbers. Girls! Let’s do this thing.”

  The man all but flees when my girls jump up and start hooting with excitement. They look and sound like a pack of jackals but as I smile, fluff my dress, and march to the door I feel all kinds of satisfied with the debacle I’m about to cause.

  YouTube, get ready. This girl’s about to break your shit.

  ***

  Paul

  I’m standing in the shadow of the balcony in the church with my gut churning and my heart so heavy, breathing hurts. I didn’t want to come back here and witness my woman marrying that little shit but Jack personally came out yesterday to drag me back here, saying it was something I needed to do.

  According to him I should never overlook Dot and the lengths she’ll go to for those she loves. That pissed me off because hell, how can I be okay with that knowing that she’s finally buckled beneath her parents and is making the biggest mistake of her life?

  She belongs to me. She loves me. Why can’t she see past all the other shit and see that?

  “Chill, bro. Don’t go ruining this for everyone by melting down now,” Woody cautions me when I growl at Alex’s appearance at the altar.

  He looks so smug and self-satisfied that I want to jump down there and beat him into a coma with my bare hands.

  I won’t, though. I would never humiliate Dot that way and take her choices away from her. She’s chosen Alex, for whatever reason she’s spinning in that little head of hers, and I can’t do a thing about it but watch the woman I love go through with this.

  The wedding march starts playing in the background, softly, getting louder as the minutes tick by and I feel myself go tense when the doors open and a vision in white appears, her red hair so stark against the pure white of her dress that I feel my lungs stall.

  “God in heaven,” I breathe when she smiles sweetly and starts to slowly make her way down the aisle.

  Her girls all flank her and blow kisses, generally making a spectacle of themselves and I almost swallow my tongue when I see my own mother standing off to the side, grinning broadly as she trains a camera on the procession.

  “What the fuck is Mom doing here? Is that Grammy?” I wheeze when I hear a deep, manly cackle ring out when Percy starts jamming and jigging her way down the aisle.

  I could laugh and I do, chuckling softly when all five women seem to take the cue and start dancing around and down the passage in an uncoordinated melee of movement.

  I laugh harder when my very own Dot starts doing the robot and segues into the shuffle, laughing so hard I hear her snort as she catches her breath and moves onto the electric slide. At least her version of it.

  Woody laughs beside me and hands me his hip flask as we watch the debacle unfold beneath us.

  “What are they doing?” I wheeze, choking on the whiskey when a very pregnant Callie starts shaking her belly and hopping forward all the way to the altar.

  Jack and Freddie are pissing themselves and I even spot Gruffy bowing to the crowd with pride, obviously acknowledging them as her handiwork.

  “Putting on a show, bro.” Woody chuckles, shaking his head.

  Dot finally reaches the altar and a fuming Alex, stupid bastard. How can he not be impressed by that? I turn away then, unable to watch as he takes her hand and pulls her into place as the guests all sit and await what I feel like is the end of my world.

  “Watch,” Woody growls, shoving at my shoulder.

  “I can’t. I need to get out of here before I do something—”

  “Christ! Just watch, you fucking fool. You think Dot shimmied her way down the aisle, as shy as she is, because she’s just tickled to be marrying that asshole? Watch.”

  I give in and turn as the priest who is still smiling widely starts doing his thing about love and commitment and the holiness of a loving marriage.

  Loving? She loves me! Not him. Me.

  He finally stops making my ears bleed and gets to the part I vowed to ignore, though it takes a herculean effort for me not to yell out and get my ass down there to her.

  “If any should object to this holy union, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

  Alex just grins and I see Dot smirk before she shakes his hand off and turns to the crowd.

  “Seriously? No one? You’re all just going to sit there and pretend that you’re not trying to marry me off to Satan’s helper?” she yells, shaking her head and looking heavenward before sighing deeply and looking back at her Naughties with a smile. “You were so right, guys. My parents are greedy assholes with not a scrap of humanity left in them.”

  The whispering starts and I see them go stiff as Alex grabs her arm and swings her around roughly.

  “Chill. Watch,” Woody growls, handing me the flask again.

  He must be arguing with her, though I don’t hear a damn word before she pulls away again and stomps her little foot.

  “No! You behave! Did you really think that I would break off my engagement with Paul, the man I freaking love with all my heart, to marry your weak ass! What a freaking crock. You’re like what, five years old mentally?” she sneers, making my heart leap.

  “Stop this at once!”

  “No you stop, you stinking pile of garbage! You and those…those people who call themselves my parents have been dogging me for months to marry you when I told you all along I don’t even like you. I love Paul! Do you hear that, Alexander Summers? I love Paul. Remember him? He’s the guy who walked in on you and his ex making the ugly, nasty beast with two backs. He’s the guy who kept you in his life even though you aren’t worth one of his precious breaths, and he’s the guy who saved me from marrying you in the first place and making the biggest mistake of my life.”

  I need to get to her right now but Woody grabs me and restrains me before I can move, shaking his head and looking back down at my girl as she starts laughing and slaps Alex’s hands away.

  “Don’t you dare touch me, you pig. Hey, everyone! Did you all know that Mr. Hotshot over here lost all his money on investments a two-year-old wouldn’t make? He did! He’s broke, without a blue bean, and living on credit that’s about to be called in since his dad cut him off.”

  “Dorothea, st
op this nonsense at once,” he yells, getting handsy so fast I feel my blood spike.

  I shouldn’t have worried, though, because the two violent ones step forward immediately, ready to lay him flat just as Dot pulls her arm back and knocks him on his ass.

  “My name is Dot. D-O-T. Get it right, loser. Now I’m going to tell you all why this genius and my parents are in on this together,” she says brightly, kicking Alex’s hand away with a huff when he tries to grab her.

  I’m high on satisfaction when he finally stumbles to his feet, blood pouring from a nose I can see from even here is broken.

  “See, there’s this clause thing that the old Summers and Harper granddaddies wrote into their wills. Apparently they foresaw disaster at some point and decided to leave six hundred mill behind in case of trouble. All we have to do to get that money is marry. One Harper, one Summers, and BOOM! We’re stinking rich again.”

  That gets the girls laughing as she sighs and I take a minute to look down, only to see her parents trying to make a hasty exit unnoticed.

  Gruffy, in all her evil glory, whacks the father across the head and bitch slaps the mom right back into her seat just as Dot swings around, eyes blazing.

  “Oh don’t leave just yet, guys! The show’s not over. Why don’t you all tell your friends how I got engaged to Paul, the man I love, only to have you orchestrating the downfall of my relationship? Oh, what? You thought I wouldn’t figure it all out by now. Poor foolish, biddable Dot. She’ll just do what makes others happy. Well not this time, Mom! You want to tell all these people how you told me you had cancer for months when you were already in remission? Or how you took money from me to give to Alex to pay off his debts?”

  Her voice is an octave higher than usual and I flinch when she actually cackles and starts clapping her hands in a frenzy.

  My poor baby looks maniacal as she slaps Alex again and shoves her hands on her hips.

  “You don’t want to speak? That’s too bad. Listen up, because I am saying this again and it’s the last motherfucking time! I will not marry this pig. I am not your kid. I love Paul. I’m marrying him and moving to his ranch and I’m going to take all that lovely money that we get from that will and give it all away!” she crows, making Alex sob into his hands.

  “Oh and FYI, this is going on the Internet, so I need to send a shoutout to Sarah Grover and just say thanks a lot for being a raging slut and leaving Paul to a real woman like me. Peace!”

  The show seems to end on a crescendo as she flips everyone the bird and waves at her girls to follow. Jack sidles up to Callie with a grin, Freddie and his stroller full of babies flanks Luci, and the terrible two start skipping down the aisle, rapping and striking poses to close off the show.

  Just before Dot makes it halfway to the door, that mother of hers finally finds her tongue and jumps in front of her.

  “That is my wedding dress, and seeing as you are no longer my daughter, I want it back!”

  “You want it back?”

  “Yes.”

  “This dress?”

  “Yes.”

  “You sure?”

  “Of course I am sure, you little fool. I expect it returned by this evening or I will have you charged with theft.”

  Dot cocks her head to the side as if contemplating the lower life-form in her path and does what I will remember for the rest of my freaking life.

  She smiles and waves at Percy.

  “Let’s give her her raggedy-ass dress back, shall we? Can’t be locked up when I got plans for a certain cowboy and his chaps.”

  “Hot damn!”

  Percy grins, hops to, and I’m staring at my woman in a white strapless push-up bra and Barney panties as she flings the dress at her mother, squares her shoulders, and stalks out of the church, head held high.

  The panties are so small I see a lot more of her than I would like, but I’m laughing my ass off when Percy and Indie start hosing and checking her ass out.

  “You still wear those?”

  “They’re my lucky panties. Of course I wear them when I have an important thing to do.”

  “But they’re for a twelve-year-old ass!” Indie sputters.

  “You saying my ass got fat?”

  “No. But I can see parts of your vagina.”

  “Lucky you. Now come the hell on! I have a man to go woo, you losers.”

  They stalk out to the sounds of people laughing and a moaning Alex who has only just now realized that he is well and truly screwed.

  I’m grinning from ear to ear as Woody drags me out the back and starts laying out Dot’s plans in a way that makes me love her all the more.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Barney, Help Me

  Dot

  “Stop moving, I’m almost done,” Indie snaps, socking me a good one to the side of the head when I shift again and groan.

  It’s been exactly two days since the wedding and though I’m anxious to get my life back on track I’m still in the city putting it all together.

  Right now I have a lot of love and a plan that could flop at a moment’s notice.

  All in all I feel good. If the two idiots I call sisters would stop trying to kill me.

  “This is the last one, loser. Hold still or these lips won’t be in those Barney panties after all,” Indie warns, yanking the wax strip with a flourish as I howl and slap at her hands.

  My plan is simple and yet so convoluted that it’s taken me two whole days to get it ready. I’m starting this shit with a bang and grooming myself to death so I can finally lose the dirty girl title that’s being bandied about.

  “That is so enough. My junk hurts and if this works I at least want to have sex sometime this month, you idiots.”

  “And you will. I just had to clean it up so your gift is visible.”

  The waxing is just to facilitate the gift, and plus, the tattoo artist made some really unnecessary comments about my bush growth and I was feeling a little raw about it.

  When I feel like I can stand and walk without passing out, I lever myself up and look down, grinning at the tattoo that winks up at me from the area just above my mound.

  Perfect.

  Now all I have to do is get going and get my ass to the private jet so I can go home.

  “You ready for this?”

  “No, but I’m going so pass me the Barneys and let’s get this going.”

  “If he asks about our kiss—”

  “Shut up, Percy.”

  ***

  Paul

  It’s been two days since I landed and got back home. I haven’t slept a wink as yet and I’ve called Woody at least six times to ask him where the hell Dot is.

  I wanted to grab her and drag her home right after her show-man what a show, but Woody refused to let me go and started talking about how Dot had to be the one to finally break free of her past and come to me with this big declaration and shit.

  I accepted only because at the time it tickled me to think that she’s going to go all out and make a public spectacle for me, something I never thought I needed but now look forward to with so much delight, I’m like a kid in a candy store just thinking about her claiming me.

  Me—the guy who’s loved only once before and couldn’t even kiss his fiancée in public because she didn’t like it. The fact that Dot is not only giving up her life to come to me but is also going to come at me with guns blazing makes me rock hard and ready to beat my chest.

  If only she’d freaking get here.

  Not that she needs to do this. We all saw her declaring me hers in that church, and from the numbers I’ve seen on the net, half the world has seen it, too.

  Even Jules and the boys found it and I haven’t seen those fools stop grinning since then.

  That shit is funny and heart-warming and makes me want to bust with pride.

  “Hey, boss, I see a car headed this way,” Jules grunts as I push away from the corral where I’ve been watching him work one of the cutting horses.

  I see the ca
r too and I’m almost ready to start running when I hear her come blaring back into my life.

  “That her?” Jules laughs, coming up behind me just as she tumbles out of the car and starts rubbing at her butt where her skirt is drenched from the hours spent on the road.

  “You bet your ass that’s her.”

  “Remember, play it cool now or she’ll be disappointed when she doesn’t get to do the whole thing,” he warns.

  “I know! Jesus, what am I, five? Woody already called me this morning and went over it all again.”

  With that I school my face as I slowly amble my way down to the front yard where Dot is still standing, ringing her hands at my approach.

  She’s so gorgeous right now I have to lock my legs and arms against the urge to grab her and kiss the hell out of her. I’ve missed her every minute of every day that we’ve been apart and I just need to feel her so my stupid body will believe what my eyes are seeing.

  “Paul.”

  “Dorothea,” I growl, standing my ground as she starts fidgeting around and toes the dirt beneath her feet.

  “I, uh, I need to er, do something and, um, I don’t quite know if you’ll get it or not, seeing as you don’t like my movies and all, but, I—”

  “Get to it, woman. I don’t have all day to stand around here and make idle fucking chitchat with you.”

  “The men—”

  “Working,” I growl, denying her the public spectacle she’s been hoping for because I am selfish. I want this all for me and no one else.

  And I can’t wait much longer.

  No, I need this over with because I need to grab you and take you to bed before my dick explodes.

  My tone makes her swallow and take a deep breath before she seems to stiffen her spine.

  “Well? Get to it, Dot.”

  “Dammit. Shit, just don’t…”

  She trails off and I almost take pity on her but she proves me wrong by thinking she’s not strong enough for this and faces me with so much love in her eyes it’s humbling

  “I’m so scared, Paul. I’m scared of walking off this ranch and never feeling the rest of my life the way I feel when I’m with you. Because I don’t want to just sit at a pottery wheel with you and have one moment. I don’t want to have you dancing with me and then leave me behind. I don’t want to have one last love scene with you and walk away all alone again as you go off into the light. I want you to take me out of the corner. I want you to teach me how to dance dirty. Most of all, I want to look at you every single morning and know that I never have to watch another movie again because you’re all the love I will ever need in my life.”